Hey there, folks! 🎉 Guess what? The City of Oakland, California, decided to throw its own little shooting party over the weekend. Yeah, you heard me right – it’s like they were trying to break the record for the most chaotic neighborhood barbecue. 😂🔫
So, this wild ride began at the ungodly hour of 1:30 a.m. on a Sunday – you know, that magical time when most of us are peacefully snuggled in bed, drooling on our pillows. But not in Oakland! Nope, they were too busy having their own version of a fireworks show, right around the corner of E. 15th Street and 20th Avenue. 🎇 Except, instead of colorful sparks, they had bullets flying around like confetti. One brave soul got caught up in the crossfire and ended up taking a little trip to the hospital. Apparently, they decided it was a good time to test out their “bulletproof” pajamas. Spoiler alert: pajamas, not so bulletproof. 😅
Fast forward to 3 a.m., because apparently, 3 a.m. is the new happy hour for these shooters. Another round of gunshots echoed through the air, this time near 17th Street and San Pablo Avenue. But hey, no worries – the party was just getting started. 🕒💥
And what’s better than one shooting spree? How about two more in the span of three hours! Yep, you read that right – it’s like Oakland was playing a game of “Who Can Make the Most Noise Before Sunrise?” This time, the location was the 9200 block of E Street, and I guess they were tired of the suspense because they went straight to the grand finale: a victim who met their end right there on the scene. Ta-da! 🎩🐇
But wait, there’s more! The party planners had something extra special planned for the evening. As the sun was setting, and normal people were settling in for a cozy Netflix binge, the streets of Oakland were heating up again. A call came in, probably from someone who was like, “Hey, I’m just trying to enjoy my evening snack, could you guys keep it down?” It led the police to the 5800 block of Bancroft Avenue, where they found yet another guest who had an unexpected bullet RSVP. Medical personnel joined the party and confirmed that, yep, this wasn’t a Halloween prank – someone was actually dead. 🧟♂️🚑
But hold onto your hats, because the fun didn’t stop there! Late Monday afternoon, right when you’d think they’d be winding down like a tired DJ at a music festival, another scene unfolded. A man got the surprise of his life in the 600 block of High Street, right next to a gas station. I guess that station isn’t just pumping gas, it’s also pumping up the adrenaline. Another medical team arrived, took one look, and declared, “Well, folks, it’s official – this is definitely not a drill.” 💉🩸
And before you ask, no, I haven’t forgotten the cherry on top of this news sundae: the victims’ names are being kept secret. I mean, we can’t have anyone missing the party, right? 🤷♀️ So, folks, keep your seatbelts fastened, because Oakland’s streets are clearly hotter than a jalapeño in a sauna, and the shooters are clearly competing for the world’s most ridiculous summer Olympics event. 🏅🔥 Stay safe out there and remember, if you ever find yourself in Oakland, don’t forget your bulletproof party hat! 🎉🎩Hey there, folks! 🎉 Guess what? The City of Oakland, California, decided to throw its own little shooting party over the weekend. Yeah, you heard me right – it’s like they were trying to break the record for the most chaotic neighborhood barbecue. 😂🔫
So, this wild ride began at the ungodly hour of 1:30 a.m. on a Sunday – you know, that magical time when most of us are peacefully snuggled in bed, drooling on our pillows. But not in Oakland! Nope, they were too busy having their own version of a fireworks show, right around the corner of E. 15th Street and 20th Avenue. 🎇 Except, instead of colorful sparks, they had bullets flying around like confetti. One brave soul got caught up in the crossfire and ended up taking a little trip to the hospital. Apparently, they decided it was a good time to test out their “bulletproof” pajamas. Spoiler alert: pajamas, not so bulletproof. 😅
Fast forward to 3 a.m., because apparently, 3 a.m. is the new happy hour for these shooters. Another round of gunshots echoed through the air, this time near 17th Street and San Pablo Avenue. But hey, no worries – the party was just getting started. 🕒💥
And what’s better than one shooting spree? How about two more in the span of three hours! Yep, you read that right – it’s like Oakland was playing a game of “Who Can Make the Most Noise Before Sunrise?” This time, the location was the 9200 block of E Street, and I guess they were tired of the suspense because they went straight to the grand finale: a victim who met their end right there on the scene. Ta-da! 🎩🐇
But wait, there’s more! The party planners had something extra special planned for the evening. As the sun was setting, and normal people were settling in for a cozy Netflix binge, the streets of Oakland were heating up again. A call came in, probably from someone who was like, “Hey, I’m just trying to enjoy my evening snack, could you guys keep it down?” It led the police to the 5800 block of Bancroft Avenue, where they found yet another guest who had an unexpected bullet RSVP. Medical personnel joined the party and confirmed that, yep, this wasn’t a Halloween prank – someone was actually dead. 🧟♂️🚑
But hold onto your hats, because the fun didn’t stop there! Late Monday afternoon, right when you’d think they’d be winding down like a tired DJ at a music festival, another scene unfolded. A man got the surprise of his life in the 600 block of High Street, right next to a gas station. I guess that station isn’t just pumping gas, it’s also pumping up the adrenaline. Another medical team arrived, took one look, and declared, “Well, folks, it’s official – this is definitely not a drill.” 💉🩸
And before you ask, no, I haven’t forgotten the cherry on top of this news sundae: the victims’ names are being kept secret. I mean, we can’t have anyone missing the party, right? 🤷♀️ So, folks, keep your seatbelts fastened, because Oakland’s streets are clearly hotter than a jalapeño in a sauna, and the shooters are clearly competing for the world’s most ridiculous summer Olympics event. 🏅🔥 Stay safe out there and remember, if you ever find yourself in Oakland, don’t forget your bulletproof party hat! 🎉🎩