Hey there, folks! 🎉 Gather ’round for a story that’s gonna make you question your faith in humanity and wonder if some people just got dropped on their heads a few too many times as babies. So, we’ve got this dude from Baytown, Texas, let’s call him Stabby McStabberson, who apparently thought he was auditioning for a real-life horror movie. 🪓🩸
So, get this – Stabby McStabberson, officially known as Dantravias Jamal McNeil, decided to spice up his love life by doing something other than sending heart emojis and taking cute couple selfies. Oh no, he went full-on horror flick mode and stabbed his girlfriend 27 times. Like, dude, calm down! Who needs a stabbing spree when you could just, I don’t know, break up or something? 💔
Now, the amazing Harris County District Attorney Kim Ogg – who’s probably a pro at dealing with all sorts of cray-cray – revealed that Stabby McStabberson got sentenced to 60 years in the slammer for this little “stabby party” he threw. Apparently, he pleaded guilty to the murder of his girlfriend, Katy Houck, who he just had to stab at least 27 times. But hey, who’s counting, right?
Picture this: a motel room in Baytown, Texas, the ambiance set by a puddle of blood, and our boy Stabby, who’s more hysterical than someone who just saw a spider the size of a house. 🕷️ Of course, the Baytown Police Department got invited to this party, and guess what they found? Yep, you guessed it – Stabby McStabberson with a knife close by and poor Katy in a state that no amount of band-aids could fix.
Turns out, Stabby had a habit of seeing red, and by that, I mean blood, not just getting angry. He had not one, not two, but three prior convictions of domestic violence. And you know what’s the kicker? In all three of those cases, he played the classic “Oh, I’m the victim here” card. Dude, I’ve heard of playing the victim, but this guy took it to a whole new level. 🤦♀️
Now, in a twist that’s almost as mind-boggling as trying to understand why people still think pineapple belongs on pizza, Stabby McStabberson had the audacity to plead self-defense. Yeah, you read that right. This dude claimed he was defending himself while he was apparently turning his girlfriend into a human pincushion. Seriously, where do people come up with these “defenses”?
Assistant DA Kimberly Garcia, who’s clearly had enough of Stabby’s excuses, teamed up with Renee Serrato to bring this case to justice. They were like, “Nuh-uh, buddy, we’re not buying your self-defense story when you’ve got more stabs under your belt than a porcupine at a needle factory.” 🦔💉
So, there you have it, folks! Stabby McStabberson gets a one-way ticket to the big house, and Katy’s family can hopefully find some closure after this absolutely bonkers act of violence. Let this be a lesson to us all: if your relationship starts resembling a horror movie, it’s time to hit the eject button before someone reaches for the kitchen cutlery. Stay safe out there, and remember, love shouldn’t leave you bleeding! ❤️🚫Hey there, folks! 🎉 Gather ’round for a story that’s gonna make you question your faith in humanity and wonder if some people just got dropped on their heads a few too many times as babies. So, we’ve got this dude from Baytown, Texas, let’s call him Stabby McStabberson, who apparently thought he was auditioning for a real-life horror movie. 🪓🩸
So, get this – Stabby McStabberson, officially known as Dantravias Jamal McNeil, decided to spice up his love life by doing something other than sending heart emojis and taking cute couple selfies. Oh no, he went full-on horror flick mode and stabbed his girlfriend 27 times. Like, dude, calm down! Who needs a stabbing spree when you could just, I don’t know, break up or something? 💔
Now, the amazing Harris County District Attorney Kim Ogg – who’s probably a pro at dealing with all sorts of cray-cray – revealed that Stabby McStabberson got sentenced to 60 years in the slammer for this little “stabby party” he threw. Apparently, he pleaded guilty to the murder of his girlfriend, Katy Houck, who he just had to stab at least 27 times. But hey, who’s counting, right?
Picture this: a motel room in Baytown, Texas, the ambiance set by a puddle of blood, and our boy Stabby, who’s more hysterical than someone who just saw a spider the size of a house. 🕷️ Of course, the Baytown Police Department got invited to this party, and guess what they found? Yep, you guessed it – Stabby McStabberson with a knife close by and poor Katy in a state that no amount of band-aids could fix.
Turns out, Stabby had a habit of seeing red, and by that, I mean blood, not just getting angry. He had not one, not two, but three prior convictions of domestic violence. And you know what’s the kicker? In all three of those cases, he played the classic “Oh, I’m the victim here” card. Dude, I’ve heard of playing the victim, but this guy took it to a whole new level. 🤦♀️
Now, in a twist that’s almost as mind-boggling as trying to understand why people still think pineapple belongs on pizza, Stabby McStabberson had the audacity to plead self-defense. Yeah, you read that right. This dude claimed he was defending himself while he was apparently turning his girlfriend into a human pincushion. Seriously, where do people come up with these “defenses”?
Assistant DA Kimberly Garcia, who’s clearly had enough of Stabby’s excuses, teamed up with Renee Serrato to bring this case to justice. They were like, “Nuh-uh, buddy, we’re not buying your self-defense story when you’ve got more stabs under your belt than a porcupine at a needle factory.” 🦔💉
So, there you have it, folks! Stabby McStabberson gets a one-way ticket to the big house, and Katy’s family can hopefully find some closure after this absolutely bonkers act of violence. Let this be a lesson to us all: if your relationship starts resembling a horror movie, it’s time to hit the eject button before someone reaches for the kitchen cutlery. Stay safe out there, and remember, love shouldn’t leave you bleeding! ❤️🚫